My Vagabond Ways

I finally got tired of not being rescued .. so I decided to take a little rail trip this weekend to explore the world outside of Lodi.  Unfortunately, I wasn't able to secure LUXURY transportation, but it beats sitting in a dark box inside of an Alarm Company's warehouse.

Despite the general discomfort of the transportation, I DID still feel at home riding on this railcar.  It had a tank full of gas right next to where I sat, which was kind of like sitting next to the gluten-less Bob Gross during our Wednesday morning meetings.

As I hopped on the railcar, I looked across the yard adjacent to the rail lines and noticed Meehleis Modular Buildings just across the street.  I tried ringing real loud to see if Past President Mike would wave back, but I didn't see him ... but then again, no one has in almost 18 months.  Or maybe he did see me and just didn't want to wave.  Either way, he can kiss my brass.

Fortunately I snatched a Blackberry from the guy riding the rails with me (he fell asleep), which gave me access to the internet.  So as long as this battery holds out, I should be able to stay in touch.

I'll write again, or call someone, if I need any money!  See you all down the tracks!

Yours in Rotary,
Dingy Da Bell

Living La Vida Vino

So as the official bell of a Rotary Club in Lodi, California - best known for its wine grapes and wineries, and the Creedence song "Stuck In Lodi" - I feel obligated to get out from time to time and sample some of the local Vino.

So on Sunday November 14th I found myself the feature attraction in the tasting room at Macchia Winery.  What a joy to spend the day surrounded by tall, slender, alcohol filled ... um ... bottles (not to mention the gals working the tasting room).  If you look closely, you'll know why I insisted on planting my brass on the tasting room bar.

I was fortunate to spend the day in the company of great wine, beautiful women, drunken patrons, and a band that performed some of the best classic rock I have heard in a long time.  Journey, Kansas, The Cars, The Eagles and much more.  I felt like I was back in the 70's when part of me was working as a "door knocker".

I want you all to know that I have CONSIDERED returning to the club many times over the past months, but then I heard the horror stories of President Steve using an airhorn to begin and end meetings and - to be quite honest - I would feel bad coming back right now because at least NOW Bob Gross knows when the meetings are starting (i.e. time for a nap) and ending (i.e. time to wake up).

I hope all of you have fun cleaning the highway.  If you find a partially filled bottle of Brasso by any chance, please save it for me.  I'm sure I'll need a good buffing once I return.

Yours in Rotary,
Dingy Da Bell

Da Bell, Debauchery

Having just come off a "bender" with "Calamity Jane", I thought I was going to avoid the party atmosphere of Vegas and just spend some quiet time in my room watching TV, pay-per-view, or the Adult Channel.  Everything was going great.. I was kicking back in bed with my favorite adult beverage, watching the Adult Channel and minding my own business.  Things were totally in-control until my host and his lovely wife wanted the room to themselves for awhile, so I was left to fend for myself.


So feeling a little tipsy, I found my way down to the casino (hopped a ride on a room service cart) and was fortunate enough to meet a couple of celebrities, and two girls wearing sparkly red outfits.

Have I told you how much I like the color red?  And ... isn't Elvis dead?

After some small talk, and a lot of gawking (thanks, Dolly!) I made my way to the slot machines!  There I won a brass-load of money playing the progressive slot.  I can tell you .. when I hit that jackpot ... well, this bell hasn't heard THAT many BELLS ring since that bell-orgy in Budapest just after my casting.  But I digress... Here I am posing with the very slot machine that made me the richest bell on the strip!

I managed to hop back on a room service cart for a trip back up to my floor, and when I entered the elevator I was accosted by two Casino security personnel.  They demanded to see what was on my camera.  Upon seeing the picture of me with a slot machine, they then demanded that I delete the photo.  I guess they have some sensitivity to people taking photos on the casino floor.

Obviously, after much sweet talking - and explaining that I was a ROTARY BELL (Apparently they first thought I was affiliated with the Lions Club) .. they let me keep the picture!  So now I am able to share!

I made it safely back to the room, where my host and his wife were still going at it.  I waited outside in the hall until morning, when my hosts graciously brought me back into the room with their USA Today.

Don't know what tonight has in store (Saturday).  Will report back tomorrow, if I'm still ring-able.

Yours in Rotary,
Dingy

All I Can Say Is ... Yeeee, Hawwww!!!!

Well my fellow Rotarians.  I'd like to say I miss you all, but that wouldn't be quite true.  Ever since being snatched by one of you at this year's kickout dinner, I have been living a rather mundane life stuffed away in someone's closet.

But, alas .. I've busted loose..... and when I say "Busted", I mean that literally. 

The other morning I woke up in a hay loft, not quite sure how I got there.  I had a "ringing" in my ears, and really couldn't remember much about what happened the previous night.... until now.

Apparently there were three of us at last night's party .. me (the bell), Miss Kitty (name has been changed to protect the not-so-innocent), and some sort of buffalo.

Fortunately, I recovered nicely.  I attribute that to the quality of my brass.

This weekend I am off to the Bay Area for an adventure with one of our fellow Lodi Sunrise Rotarians.

From what I hear, there may be some other kind of bell ringing going on in our room (a.k.a. "Boot Knocking") so hopefully I won't have to endure anything primal.

Then the weekend after I am supposed to be going up to the high country.  We'll see!  In the meantime, I hope you are enjoying my cousin .. the airhorn!

Yours in Rotary,
Dingy Da Bell!